# STAR Network

> Become a Survivor of Toxic Abusive Relationships!


## Posts

- [The Guests of Talk TV: My First STARs](https://starnetwork.org/the-guests-of-talk-tv-my-first-stars/): For two decades, I lived in a paradox. I was a clinician operating inside a traumatic warzone, "dancing with the devil" to reach an audience of millions. People gathered around their television sets daily to watch a spectacle of human suffering. They saw the traumatic hell, the shouting matches, and the broken families, but they rarely saw the path out. I stayed because I knew that if I could survive the environment, I could deliver a message of hope to the living rooms of people who felt they had nowhere else to turn.
- [Why Does It Always Take a Celebrity or Their Family’s Tragedy to Get Our Attention?](https://starnetwork.org/why-does-it-always-take-a-celebrity-or-their-familys-tragedy-to-get-our-attention/): Trauma, Addiction, and the World’s Deadly Confusion The world is drowning in confusion. We debate policies, fund treatment centers, and cycle people through endless programs, yet we fail to confront the root causes of addiction: trauma, PTSD, and CPTSD. This failure is not abstract — it is lethal. The tragedy of Rob Reiner and his wife, murdered after decades of attempts to navigate countless treatment centers, is a devastating reminder. Their story is not just personal; it is systemic. It exposes a world that treats symptoms while ignoring the wounds beneath them. The Op-Ed Argument: Why We’re Getting It Wrong […]
- [TAR Anon – PACEs Connection Story (Part 2 of 2)](https://starnetwork.org/tar-anon-paces-connection-story-part-2-of-2/): By Carey SippCo-Director, VolunteerPACEs Connectioncsipp.pacescommunities@gmail.com (Activation warning. This is a first-person opinion piece sharing my thoughts on toxic abusive relationships [TAR] and a relatively new 12-step program, TAR Anon, which offers free, solution-oriented, acceptance-based, and psychologically-safe Zoom meetings from 6-7 PM ET on Mondays and Wednesdays, 2:30-3:30 PM ET on Tuesdays and Thursdays, and from 12 Noon-1 PM ET on Fridays. This is a warning regarding potentially activating language, so you can choose whether or not you wish to continue reading. Further, I extend the activation warning to the program’s TAR Tales, where TAR Anon members share their stories.) TAR Anon can […]
- [TAR Anon – PACEs Connection Story (Part 1 of 2)](https://starnetwork.org/tar-anon-paces-connection-story-part-1-of-2/): By Carey SippCo-Director, VolunteerPACEs Connectioncsipp.pacescommunities@gmail.com (Activation warning. This is a first-person opinion piece sharing my thoughts on toxic abusive relationships [TAR] and a relatively new 12-step program, TAR Anon, which offers free, solution-oriented, acceptance-based, and psychologically-safe Zoom meetings from 6-7 PM ET on Mondays and Wednesdays, 2:30-3:30 PM ET on Tuesdays and Thursdays, and from 12 Noon-1 PM ET on Fridays. This is a warning regarding potentially activating language, so you can choose whether or not you wish to continue reading. Further, I extend the activation warning to the program’s TAR Tales, where TAR Anon members share their stories.) (Illustration from the […]
- [Gaslighting at Work – The Phrases That Break You Down](https://starnetwork.org/gaslighting-at-work-the-phrases-that-break-you-down/): I’ll never forget the day I was asked by a CEO to meet with a member of the sales team about building more inclusive practices. He assured me the executive responsible for sales was aware, so I went straight to the sales manager. We had a great conversation, mapped out ideas, and developed a practical action plan. A few days later, that same executive discovered our meeting and lodged a complaint with the CEO. Instead of backing me up, the CEO called me in and said, “You shouldn’t have gone behind their back.” I calmly reminded him that he had […]
- [The Silent Crisis: Suicide and the Search for Authenticity](https://starnetwork.org/the-silent-crisis-suicide-and-the-search-for-authenticity/): September is Suicide Prevention Awareness Month… a time to raise awareness of this stigmatized, and often taboo, topic. By Jamie Huysman, PsyD, LCSW Suicidal thoughts – like many mental health conditions – can affect anyone regardless of age, gender or background. In fact, suicide is often the result of an untreated mental health condition. Suicidal thoughts, however common they may be considered, should not be considered normal. These thoughts are often indicative of more serious issues. We use this month to shift public perception, spread hope and share vital information to people affected by suicide. Our goal is ensuring that […]
- [When Leaders Cross the Line: Spotting Subtle Signs of Toxic Leadership](https://starnetwork.org/when-leaders-cross-the-line-spotting-subtle-signs-of-toxic-leadership/): He never yelled. He never swore. He didn’t throw chairs across the room or slam his fists on the table. In fact, on paper, he looked like the perfect leader – professional, calm, and by the book. However, I’d leave our meetings feeling uncomfortable, somehow smaller, less sure of myself, and quietly wondering if I knew what I was doing. That’s the tricky part about toxic leadership. It isn’t always the screaming boss you see in movies. Sometimes it’s polite. Controlled. Hidden behind a smile and a handshake. Because it’s subtle, you can miss it for years… until the damage […]
- [STAR Network and CPTSD Foundation – Standing for Recovery and Authenticity](https://starnetwork.org/standing-for-recovery-and-authenticity/): “The world is a vampire” is a telling line from the powerful song, “Bullet with Butterfly Wings” by The Smashing Pumpkins. That is why we wanted to write this article this month around the differences between a charity with a worldwide mission and a for-profit organization. A nonprofit asks “How can we help?” A for-profit asks “How much can we charge?” Same service, different soul. As Executive Director of our charity, STAR Network Foundation – and as a psychologist who has spent over three decades in the trenches of treatment and advocacy – I want to speak candidly to you […]
- [Main Toxic Beliefs that Keep You Stuck in Trauma](https://starnetwork.org/main-toxic-beliefs-that-keep-you-stuck-in-trauma/): Core beliefs are foundational ideas that shape how we see ourselves and the world. Often, these beliefs form early in life, based on our experiences and interactions with others.  Some beliefs are constructive, giving us confidence and purpose, but others — particularly for those who have endured trauma — can become negative and toxic.  These harmful beliefs are often the result of mistreatment or emotional abuse, and they can deeply impact our sense of self-worth and how we relate to others. A toxic core belief might emerge in situations of persistent criticism or neglect. For example, if a partner constantly […]
- [Nutrition for Your Mind and Body](https://starnetwork.org/nutrition-for-your-mind-and-body/): Self-Care Goes Beyond What We Eat When we think of nutrition, we often focus on food – fueling our bodies with the nutrients needed for energy, strength, and overall well-being.  But what if true nourishment extends beyond diet?  In this article, you’ll discover how mental and emotional well-being also require proper “nutrition” – through positive thoughts, meaningful connections, and intentional self-care.  Just as we carefully choose what we eat, we must also be mindful of what we feed our minds. Keep reading to explore how your thoughts impact your well-being and learn practical ways to nourish both your mind and […]
- [Fame and Mental Health: The Responsibility of Influencers in the Digital Age](https://starnetwork.org/fame-and-mental-health-influencers-responsibility/): In today’s digital landscape, influencers wield immense power. Their words, actions, and content shape public opinion, influence societal norms, and, for better or worse, impact mental health.  While fame offers financial rewards and social recognition, it also brings a significant responsibility – one that too often goes overlooked. The rise of social media has democratized fame, allowing individuals from all walks of life to build audiences and gain influence.  But with this power comes the duty to be mindful of the content they produce and its potential effects on their followers.  This article explores the darker side of fame, drawing […]
- [How to Survive a Traumatic Experience: Steps to Reclaim Your Life](https://starnetwork.org/how-to-survive-a-traumatic-experience-steps-to-reclaim-your-life/): Trauma is a deeply personal and life-altering experience. Whether it stems from a single catastrophic event or a series of distressing moments, its impact goes far beyond the surface.  As renowned trauma expert Dr. Gabor Maté explains, “Trauma is not what happens to you, but what happens inside you as a result of what happened to you.”  This profound insight shifts the focus from external events to the internal struggles that trauma creates within us – and reminds us that healing requires addressing the emotional wounds left behind. If you’re on a journey of recovery after a traumatic experience, know […]
- [7 Clear Signs You’re Dealing With Angry Person](https://starnetwork.org/7-clear-signs-youre-dealing-with-angry-person/): You might be surprised to realize how many individuals in your circle struggle with hidden anger.  Anger isn’t always loud and explosive. In many cases, it’s buried beneath the surface, hidden behind smiles or polite conversations.  But even when anger doesn’t seem obvious, it has a way of seeping into interactions, relationships, and even the atmosphere around us. You might not realize it, but you could be dealing with someone harboring unresolved anger right now.  Identifying the signs early can help you avoid unnecessary conflict and better understand the emotions driving their behavior. In the following lines, you’ll discover 7 […]
- [Self-Care: Keep Yourself a Priority All Year Round](https://starnetwork.org/self-care-keep-yourself-a-priority-all-year-round/): The end of the holiday season often leaves us feeling drained, both emotionally and physically.  After weeks of celebration, responsibilities, and the hustle and bustle of the holidays, it’s easy to forget the importance of self-care.  But now that the festive season is over, it’s the perfect time to refocus on nurturing yourself and restoring balance to your life. In this article, you’ll discover practical ways to incorporate self-care into your routine, rebuild your emotional reserves, and find solutions for long-term well-being. So, let’s begin. Why Self-Care is Essential Taking care of yourself isn’t a luxury – it’s a necessity. […]
- [How First Responders Are at Risk for PTSD & CPTSD After L.A. Wildfires ](https://starnetwork.org/how-first-responders-are-at-risk-for-ptsd-cptsd-after-wildfires/): Since January 7, 2025, Southern California has been grappling with a series of 30 wildfires that have devastated the Los Angeles metropolitan area and surrounding regions.  As of January 18, 2025, two of the largest fires – the Palisades Fire in Pacific Palisades and the Eaton Fire in Altadena – continue to burn.  These fires have caused the most destruction, likely ranking as the fourth and second most devastating wildfires in California’s history. While the physical devastation is evident, the psychological toll on residents and first responders often goes unnoticed.  STAR Network is the leading global trauma support network, offering […]
- [How Narcissists Can Turn Your Family Against You](https://starnetwork.org/how-narcissists-turn-your-family-against-you/): The bonds of family should be unshakable, offering support and love in even the toughest times. Yet, when a narcissist enters the picture, they can manipulate and fracture these ties, leaving you feeling isolated and betrayed. One of my closest friends experienced this firsthand. He was in a relationship with a covert narcissist, and though their relationship ended, they share custody of their son.  Tragically, his child has become a victim of parental alienation – a form of emotional abuse where one parent manipulates the child into rejecting the other parent. Despite my friend’s best efforts – seeking therapy for […]
- [7 Steps to Break Trauma Bonds With a Narcissist](https://starnetwork.org/breaking-trauma-bonds-with-narcissist/): Trauma bonding with a manipulative narcissist or psychopath can feel like an unbreakable connection, rooted in survival mechanisms.  This bond often fosters a biochemical and psychological addiction to the abuse cycle. While trauma bonds are undeniably powerful, they are not unbreakable. Breaking free requires both strategy and resilience.  In the following lines, you’ll discover a step-by-step guide to help you understand: By the end, you’ll gain clarity, actionable strategies, and the solution needed to reclaim your life and emotional well-being. Here are actionable steps to begin liberating yourself. 1. Embrace Your Anger and Acknowledge the Abuse Narcissists fear your anger […]
- [What Is an Energy Vampire, and Why Are They Often Narcissists?](https://starnetwork.org/what-is-energy-vampire-and-their-link-to-narcissism/): Have you ever spent time with someone and walked away feeling utterly drained, as if all your emotional energy had been sucked away?  You might have encountered an energy vampire. These individuals, often narcissists, thrive on draining the emotional and mental resources of others to feed their own needs.  As Dr. Jamie Huysman, STAR Network Founder and Executive Director, aptly puts it: “Narcissists are like vampires – they can’t create their own light, so they feed off the energy, attention, and love of others.”  In the following lines we will talk more about understanding the dynamics of energy vampires, their […]
- [Why Do Victims of Toxic Relationships Form Emotional Bonds with Their Abusers?](https://starnetwork.org/why-do-victims-of-tar-form-emotional-bonds-with-abusers/): Why do victims of toxic and abusive relationships feel emotionally attached to their abusers? For those who haven’t experienced it, the answer can be perplexing.  However, the bond known as trauma bonding, is a deeply ingrained psychological response, often tied to survival mechanisms. For survivors, these emotional ties can feel unbreakable, trapping them in cycles of abuse. If you or someone you love struggles with trauma bonding, this guide will help unravel its complexities, offering insights into healing and recovery. What Is Trauma Bonding? Trauma bonding refers to a powerful emotional attachment formed through cycles of abuse and affection.  This […]
- [Richard Grannon Joins STAR Network as STAR Awareness Ambassador to Champion Trauma Healing and Empower Survivors Worldwide](https://starnetwork.org/richard-grannon-joins-star-network-star-awareness-ambassador/): At STAR Network, we are proud to announce Richard Grannon, a renowned coach and influencer in trauma and narcissistic recovery, as our official STAR Awareness Ambassador.  Richard’s dedication to educating and empowering individuals impacted by toxic abusive relationships, narcissistic abuse, and Complex PTSD (CPTSD) makes him the perfect voice to amplify this life-saving message. In a world where trauma often goes unseen, Richard’s mission is clear:  “The content we create can trigger someone without us knowing,” Richard says. “We don’t know what’s happening behind closed doors or in someone else’s yard. That’s why it’s our duty to approach these conversations […]
- [You Don't Have To Love Your Mother, Love Yourself](https://starnetwork.org/you-dont-have-to-love-your-mother-love-yourself/): My mother taught me many things. One of them was to live in fear. For years, symptoms of agoraphobia (fearing and avoiding places or situations that might cause panic and feelings of being trapped, helpless or embarrassed) lingered in the background of my life, trying to keep me down.  While the exact cause of agoraphobia remains unclear, environmental factors are believed to play a significant role. I know exactly where mine came from. I inherited it from my mother! My mother suffered from frequent panic attacks and severe anxiety. As a child, I witnessed many of her episodes.  It was […]
- [Rebuilding Relationships: Embracing Balance, Healing, and Partnership ](https://starnetwork.org/rebuilding-relationships-embracing-balance-healing-partnership/): “What about me?”  It took these three words for me to realize I needed to make a change in my marriage.  During an argument, my husband (who was feeling overlooked) stated and asked:  “You do an amazing job managing finances and making decisions, but you don’t even consult me. I feel like I’m at the bottom of the list. Who am I? How can I contribute?”  Those words hit me hard. Like many women, I was juggling the roles of mother, wife, friend, and professional all while unknowingly sidelining my husband.  He had been relegated to the background, not because […]
- [My Journey to Healing: From Trauma to Empowerment with STAR Network](https://starnetwork.org/journey-to-healing-from-trauma-to-empowerment/): Have you ever felt like you were giving everything – your time, your heart, your energy – only to feel like it was never enough?  Like no matter how hard you tried, something was always missing? I know that feeling all too well. For years, I questioned myself, wondering if my love was the missing piece.  I tiptoed around my own worth, walking on eggshells, afraid to face the truth. As a mother, these questions cut even deeper. We’re taught to nurture, to sacrifice, to give unconditionally.  But what happens when the love you give isn’t returned in a healthy […]
- [How Covert Narcissists Use 'Flying Monkeys' to Create Trauma and CPTSD — A Guide to Finding Support](https://starnetwork.org/how-covert-narcissists-use-flying-monkeys-to-create-trauma-cptsd/): One of the most painful tactics in covert narcissism is turning family members against you. This manipulative strategy, designed to isolate and control, often pulls loved ones into the narcissist’s web to unknowingly serve as flying monkeys — trusted people who, often without realizing, carry out the narcissist’s agenda. For anyone healing from the trauma of narcissistic abuse, understanding this tactic is crucial to reclaiming peace and support. A close friend of mine recently experienced the heartbreak of this firsthand. After a difficult separation from his covertly narcissistic ex, they began to share custody of their young son. Despite his […]
- [How People Use Manipulation in Relationships – A Closer Look at 5 Covert Tactics](https://starnetwork.org/manipulation-in-relationships-5-covert-tactics/): Manipulation is not exclusive to one gender – both women and men can employ manipulative tactics in relationships that can seriously impact the health of any relationship. While some may use it consciously, others might not even realize they’re manipulating. In this article you will find:  Understanding Manipulation in Relationships  Manipulation is an attempt to influence someone’s emotions or actions for personal gain, often without the other person realizing what’s happening.  It’s typically rooted in a need for control, a fear of vulnerability, or an inability to directly express desires or needs.  While manipulation can occur in any relationship (romantic, […]
- [The Public Health Disaster of Narcissism & Toxic Masculinity](https://starnetwork.org/public-health-disaster-of-narcissism-toxic-masculinity/): Narcissism and toxic masculinity aren’t just societal issues – they are public health crises disrupting relationships, families, and the mental health of men and women alike.  This November, during Men’s Health Month, STAR Network™ is hosting a transformative livestream event, Hollywood’s TAR Tales Exposed: The Public Health Disaster of Narcissism & Toxic Masculinity, to explore the far-reaching consequences of these issues and offer strategies for healing and change. Led by trauma and mental health experts Dr. Jamie Huysman and Richard Grannon, this event will dissect Hollywood’s glamorization of toxic behaviors, exposing the damage they inflict on men, women, and families […]
- [Why Do Women Lie in Relationships?](https://starnetwork.org/why-do-women-lie-in-relationships/): In relationships and marriages, women sometimes lie. Not because they seek to deceive, but because they’re navigating complex emotions, societal pressures, and the influence of toxic masculinity.  While it’s easy to focus on how toxic masculinity harms women, it’s important to recognize that it hurts men too.  In fact, toxic masculinity creates a damaging dynamic that affects both partners, often leading to dishonesty, emotional disconnection, and unresolved tension in relationships. How Toxic Masculinity Fuels Dishonesty? Toxic masculinity refers to the cultural expectations that pressure men to be dominant, unemotional, and in control. While these pressures harm women, they also harm […]
- [How Are Men Emotionally Abused?](https://starnetwork.org/how-are-men-emotionally-abused/): Before understanding my own toxic patterns rooted in childhood trauma, I unknowingly had toxic relationships—with myself and those around me. Now, in steady recovery from CPTSD, I’m aware of how past trauma shaped these patterns and recognize how they harmed not only me but also people I cared about. At times, I used manipulative tactics to get what I wanted from my partner. Admitting this isn’t easy, but it’s part of my healing. Sadly, I’ve seen many others do the same, often worse. I’ve watched men, in particular, suffer silently in Toxic Abusive Relationships, often driven to drastic changes like […]
- [Is Love Really Enough?](https://starnetwork.org/is-love-really-enough/): Have you ever wondered why, despite all the love, effort, and sacrifices you put into a relationship, it still feels like you’re walking on eggshells, always questioning your worth, and wondering if you’re the problem? That was my reality for years. I thought I had found “the one” in my ex-partner. The relationship started with fireworks—love, passion, excitement. But as time passed, subtle criticisms turned into full-blown attacks, and what was once a warm embrace felt more like a suffocating grip. I convinced myself that this was normal, that love meant sacrifice, and that if I tried harder, if I […]
- [Are You Ready to Embrace Your Inner STAR Power?](https://starnetwork.org/are-you-ready-to-embrace-your-inner-star-power/): I come from a place that no longer exists—ex-Yugoslavia, a vibrant country with a spirit that lives on. Growing up there instilled in me a deep sense of inat, a concept that originated in Turkish as “persistence,” but in Serbian culture, it means so much more. Inat embodies resilience, defiance, pride, and the courage to stand tall, even when life pushes back. The Essence of Persistence To truly understand inat, you have to see it in action. When my homeland faced extreme challenges, our people chose to live fully instead of yielding to fear. Whether it was holding rooftop gatherings […]
- [Did My Ex Even Love Me? The Painful Reality of Dating a Covert Narcissist.](https://starnetwork.org/did-my-ex-even-love-me-the-painful-reality-of-dating-a-covert-narcissist/): If you’ve ever been with someone who seemed too good to be true, only to watch them shift and become distant or critical, you may have encountered a covert narcissist. I hadn’t even heard the term, but I knew something felt wrong. He was the perfect partner at first — attentive, affectionate, making me feel like I was the only person who mattered. I thought I’d struck gold. But as I tried to connect on a deeper level, a dark emptiness within him became clearer, one that would consume any attempts I made to bridge the gap. At first, he […]
- [Did I Ever Truly Know My Mother?](https://starnetwork.org/did-i-ever-truly-know-my-mother/): In honor of Domestic Violence Awareness Month, I find myself reflecting deeply on the strength and resilience of women—especially my mother. Her life was complex, filled with unspoken struggles and sacrifices that, even now, I’m only beginning to understand. She was a woman who lived in the shadows of her fears, but behind that veil was a story of quiet bravery, untold love, and resilience that I failed to see. Unveiling a Hidden Past I grew up with a mother who was difficult to truly know. When I was born, she was 44—considered the oldest woman in our country to […]
- [How to Embrace the Raw Moments, Tough Challenges, and Joyful Wins of Parenting?](https://starnetwork.org/how-to-embrace-the-raw-moments-tough-challenges-and-joyful-wins-of-parenting/): Becoming a parent brings a profound transformation that feels like your heart is walking around outside your body. It’s a level of vulnerability that makes you realize you can’t control everything, yet it deepens your sense of purpose. As soon as my first child was born, I instinctively became a protector, ready to prioritize my baby’s well-being above all else. This new sense of responsibility reshapes priorities—suddenly, the little things that used to matter fade into the background. Your Kids Can Feel Your Emotions, Even When You Don’t Show Them Children are more perceptive than we often realize. When you’re […]
- [TAR Network is Evolving into STAR Network this October!](https://starnetwork.org/tar-network-is-evolving-into-star-network/): The article announces the TAR Network's evolution into the STAR Network, symbolizing the journey from victimhood to empowerment for survivors of toxic relationships. It emphasizes healing, community support through TAR Anon™ meetings, and the mission to help survivors overcome CPTSD and embrace self-love and resilience.
- [Navigating Co-Parenting with a Personality-Disordered Ex-Partner](https://starnetwork.org/navigating-co-parenting-with-a-personality-disordered-ex-partner/): My good friend finally had the chance to see his daughter after three weeks of constant back-and-forth emails with his ex-wife. He had pleaded to see his daughter earlier and for a longer period, but his ex-partner refused all of his requests. This is the reality of co-parenting with someone who has a personality disorder.He had no choice but to wait until the court-ordered dates, despite the court order stating that extra time could be arranged by mutual agreement. But the fact is, there are no agreements, compromises, or discussions when dealing with the toxic behavior associated with personality disorders. […]
- [The Psychology Behind Narcissistic Abuse: Understanding the Mind of a Narcissist](https://starnetwork.org/the-psychology-behind-narcissistic-abuse-understanding-the-mind-of-a-narcissist/): This blog explores Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD), its characteristics, and how gaining insight into these traits can aid in confronting and healing from narcissistic abuse.
- [Toxic Relationship Red Flags: What You Need to Know Before It's Too Late](https://starnetwork.org/toxic-relationship-red-flags-what-you-need-to-know-before-its-too-late/): Knowledge is power. When it comes to toxic relationships, knowledge can arm us with the necessary tools to take decisive action against the red flags. Knowledge also helps us to develop a strong, evidence-based foundation to bring these red flags to our loved ones’ awareness. In this article we will explore what constitutes a toxic relationship – highlighting common red flags such as lack of communication, constant criticism, controlling behavior, isolation from friends and family, and emotional manipulation. We will also analyze the impact of toxic relationships on your mental and emotional health, and providing practical strategies for recognizing and […]
- [Trauma Bonding: Exploring the Psychological Effects of Abuse](https://starnetwork.org/trauma-bonding-exploring-the-psychological-effects-of-abuse/): Trauma bonding can cause victims of abusive relationships to form powerful emotional connections with their abusers, overriding rational judgment and trapping them in the cycle of abuse. This bond confounds friends and family, who can't understand why the victim stays. Recognizing and addressing trauma bonding is essential for breaking the abuse cycle and aiding recovery. 
- [Understanding Differences: Narcissistic Personality Disorder vs. Borderline Personality Disorder](https://starnetwork.org/when-you-hear-the-word-narcissist-what-images-come-to-mind-in-everyday-language-narcissist-is-often-thrown-around-as-an-insult-or-a-label-but-did-you-know-it/): When you hear the word “narcissist” what images come to mind? In my world, “narcissist” is a term that’s both overused and misunderstood. In common vernacular, it can be inflammatory and insulting; but in medical circles Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) is a real diagnosis with real impacts on the sufferers, their families, and their friends. The good news is that it’s treatable. NPD is a complex mental health condition characterized by an inflated sense of self-importance, a need for excessive attention and admiration, and a lack of empathy. People with this diagnosis also display unhealthy emotional patterns that may include […]
- [Recognizing the Signs of Toxic Relationships: A Self-Awareness Guide](https://starnetwork.org/recognizing-the-signs-of-toxic-relationships-a-self-awareness-guide/): Imagine waking up to a bright, sunny day, only to find that dark clouds have gathered by afternoon, casting shadows over everything. Just as these changes in the weather can creep up unnoticed, the signs of a toxic relationship can often emerge gradually, leaving you in a storm you never saw coming. This guide will help you recognize those signs and reclaim your sunny days.
- [Join Our FREE Webinar- Men! Have You Stepped in TAR? ](https://starnetwork.org/join-our-free-webinar-men-have-you-stepped-in-tar/): Join us on Thursday, June 13th at 10:00 AM EDT for Men! Have You Stepped in TAR?To book a FREE place on this unique webinar, please register on Zoom Link Here - https://events.starnetwork.org/ev/c/70136426/tar-men-webinar
- [Breaking the Silence-The Hidden Epidemic of Toxic Abusive Relationships](https://starnetwork.org/breaking-the-silence-the-hidden-epidemic-of-toxic-abusive-relationships/): In a world dominated by social media highlights and blockbuster movie moments, a dark and pervasive issue hides in the shadows: Toxic Abusive Relationships (TAR). This silent pandemic doesn't make headlines, but devastates millions – stealing joy and crushing spirits behind closed doors.
- [Ari's Anthem](https://starnetwork.org/aris-anthem/): In tribute to Ari on the occasion of her 13th Birthday.
- [Join TAR Anon's Free Support Meetings - Weekly at 6:00 PM EDT](https://starnetwork.org/join-tar-anons-free-support-meetings-beginning-today-at-600-pm-edt/): In the quiet corners of our neighborhoods, behind closed doors, and within the fabric of our communities, a silent pandemic rages on. It is not one that makes headlines or prompts global alarms, yet its impact reverberates through the lives of millions worldwide. This is the pandemic of Toxic Abusive Relationships (TAR) – a hidden thief of joy, a silent killer of souls, and a destroyer of futures. Imagine a world where every word feels like a dagger to the heart, where every action leaves behind wounds that refuse to heal. This is the reality of TAR – a  realm […]
- [How Music Heals – Through Dr. Jamie’s Eyes](https://starnetwork.org/how-music-heals-through-dr-jamies-eyes/): “See Me, Feel Me, Touch Me, Heal Me” “Tommy” by The Who Music. The very word evokes so many emotions in all of our lives. Beginning with forming an integral part of human culture for centuries, everyone can identify with the way song lyrics, instruments, the ways in which music is composed, singing or playing instruments, or even just listening to our favorite songs can have a profound influence on our emotional development and overall well-being. That being said, music engagement not only shapes our personal and cultural identity but can also play a role in mood regulation and can […]
- [Meet Christian Obumseli – Another Silent Victim of TAR](https://starnetwork.org/meet-christian-obumseli-another-silent-victim-of-tar/): Christian “Toby” Obumseli. Say his name. A Miami Herald article from November 2, 2022 describes him as a “young Black professional.” With a near-invisible social media footprint, this appears to be a fit and appropriate description of this young man. Sadly, he will forever be known as an abused and murdered victim of a social media influencer/model. Toby suffered similar abuse as Johnny Depp and Anthony Bourdain, and Gabby Petito; like Anthony and Gabby, he can no longer reclaim his life. This tragedy erupted from the highly Toxic Abusive Relationship (TAR) of Toby and Courtney Clenney (aka Tailor), who at the time of […]
- [Breaking Free from Toxic Relationships: The Upcoming Launch of TAR Anon!](https://starnetwork.org/breaking-free-from-toxic-relationships-the-upcoming-launch-of-tar-anon/): Behind closed doors, in the quiet corners of our neighborhoods, and within the fabric of our communities, a silent pandemic rages on. It doesn’t make headlines or prompt global alarms, yet its impact reverberates through millions of people worldwide. This is the pandemic of toxic abusive relationships — a hidden thief of joy, a silent killer of souls, and a destroyer of futures. Imagine a world where every word feels like a dagger to the heart, where every action leaves behind wounds that refuse to heal. This is the reality of Toxic Abusive Relationships (TAR) — a realm where emotional, […]
- [Unleashing Your Inner STAR: The Scars to STARs Summit 2024](https://starnetwork.org/unleashing-your-inner-star-the-scars-to-stars-summit-2024/): The TAR Network is thrilled to announce the upcoming Scars to STARs Summit 2024, a groundbreaking online event dedicated to empowering survivors of toxic and abusive relationships. This pivotal virtual summit, scheduled for May 31, 2024, promises to provide invaluable insights and tools for those seeking to overcome the challenges posed by narcissistic abuse and reclaim their lives. What is a STAR? A STAR is a Survivor of a Toxic Abusive Relationship. The journey from enduring scars inflicted by toxic relationships to becoming a STAR is profound and transformative. It’s about recognizing one’s strength, reclaiming one’s story, and emerging resilient […]
- [Join the TAR Network’s 2024 FREE Virtual May Summit on Healing From Toxic Abusive Relationships](https://starnetwork.org/join-the-tar-networks-2024-virtual-may-summit-on-healing-from-toxic-abusive-relationships/): The TAR Network is excited to announce the upcoming Scars to STARs summit 2024, a pivotal online event dedicated to empowering survivors of toxic, abusive relationships.
- [Every Monday at 7 PM EST Join TAR Meetings to Recover From Toxic Abusive Relationships!](https://starnetwork.org/every-monday-at-7-pm-est-join-tar-meetings-to-recover-from-toxic-abusive-relationships/): Have you ever been manipulated by a loved one? Have you ever felt used and abused? Have you ever suffered at a toxic worksite? Have you avoided family gatherings due to harmful family members? Have you been a victim of narcissistic abuse? Did you or your child(ren) experience parental alienation? ​If you answered in the affirmative to any of these questions, then unfortunately you’ve experienced TAR – a toxic abusive relationship. What is a toxic abusive relationship? A toxic relationship is – at the very least – harmful. Some signs of a toxic relationship are blatant and obvious — physical […]
- [Leave the Toxicity Behind. New Year, New You – Healthier and Happier!](https://starnetwork.org/leave-the-toxicity-behind-new-year-new-you-healthier-and-happier/): If you’re in the throes of toxic relationships or friendships, here are some ways that you can figure out who those people are and rid yourself of them.
- [Becoming Aware of TAR in Tweens & Teens](https://starnetwork.org/becoming-aware-of-tar-in-tweens-teens/): TAR manifests as early as teenage years therefore its essential to stay involved in your child's life and help them tackle TAR.
- [What Survivors Need to Know About TAR](https://starnetwork.org/what-survivors-need-to-know-about-tar/): What Survivors Need to Know About TAR (Toxic Abusive Relationships), Especially When They Are a Pathological Love Relationship.
- [Saying Goodbye and Thank You to Rosalynn Carter](https://starnetwork.org/saying-goodbye-and-thank-you-to-rosalynn-carter/): Farewell to Rosalynn Carter, former First Lady of the United States and the State of Georgia – champion of mental health, caregiving, women’s rights, and people who are homeless.
- [How Parental Alienation Affects the Targeted Parent](https://starnetwork.org/how-parental-alienation-affects-the-targeted-parent/): The long term devastating effects of parental alienation for the targeted parent. 
- [Recovery from Toxic Trauma Bonding](https://starnetwork.org/recovery-from-toxic-trauma-bonding/): Understanding toxic trauma bond and its aspects and learning how to break free from it and heal. 
- [Abuse Doesn’t Discriminate: Facing Abuse in LGBTQ+  Communities](https://starnetwork.org/abuse-doesnt-discriminate-facing-abuse-in-lgbtq-communities/): LGBTQIA + youth experience relationship abuse at the same rates as heterosexual couples do. How can you protect yourself?
- [Warning Signs of a Toxic Marriage](https://starnetwork.org/warning-signs-of-a-toxic-marriage/): Signs your marriage is becoming toxic and what to do to take care of yourself. 
- [Identifying & Dealing with Toxic Behavior in Elderly Parents](https://starnetwork.org/identifying-and-dealing-with-toxic-behavior-in-elderly-parents/): Signs that your aging parent may be toxic and how to deal with them in a healthy and productive way.
- [How Women Manipulate Men](https://starnetwork.org/how-women-manipulate-men/): Learn to recognize the common manipulation tactics that women use to wrap you around their finger.
- [Subtle Signs of an Abusive and Toxic Manager](https://starnetwork.org/subtle-signs-of-an-abusive-and-toxic-manager/): Learn to recognize the signs of a toxic boss and how to deal with one while trying to keep your position in the company. 
- [Reasons Women Stay in Abusive Relationships](https://starnetwork.org/reasons-women-stay-in-abusive-relationships/): An honest look at common reasons why women tend to stay stuck in toxic and abusive relationships. 
- [Spotting Red Flags in LGBTQ Relationships: When to Walk Away](https://starnetwork.org/spotting-red-flags-in-lgbtq-relationships-when-to-walk-away/): Learn the warning signs to recognize when something isn’t right in your relationship and take action to address any issues that may arise. 
- [Taking Care of Yourself in a Toxic Worksite](https://starnetwork.org/taking-care-of-yourself-in-a-toxic-worksite/): Tips on how do you manage your mental health when you are stuck in the toxic worksite.  
- [There Is No Such Thing As Co-Parenting With A Narcissist — Only “Counter-Parenting”](https://starnetwork.org/there-is-no-such-thing-as-parenting-with-a-narcissist-only-counter-parenting/): How to mitigate the damage and raise your child in a healthy environment while dealing with a narcissistic ex. 
- [Men – Also Victims of Emotional and Physical Abuse](https://starnetwork.org/men-are-victims-of-emotional-and-physical-abuse-too/): If you’re a male experiencing abuse, you’re likely all too aware of this. And you probably feel alone, isolated, and possibly ashamed of your circumstances. We can help you.
- [Narcissistic Abuse: How It Affects Your Body & Mind](https://starnetwork.org/ways-narcissistic-abuse-affects-your-body-and-mind/): Being in relationship with narcissist can be mentally and physically draining - below are effects the experience has on your body and mind.
- [Olivia Rodrigo Can Help You Heal Your Bruised Soul No Matter How Old You Are](https://starnetwork.org/how-olivia-rodrigo-can-help-you-heal-your-bruised-soul-no-matter-how-old-are-you/): Healing your inner teen with Olivia Rodrigo's new album GUTS.
- [Loving Someone in Need of Care Takes a Toll](https://starnetwork.org/when-loving-someone-in-need-of-care-takes-a-toll-on-you/): Partners of trauma survivors need to engage in self-care to prevent burnout, and best help their partner, themselves and their families.
- [The Best Ways to Respond to Parental Alienation](https://starnetwork.org/what-is-the-best-way-to-respond-to-parental-alienation/): Providing tips how to respond in the most adequate way to parental alienation while focusing on your child's needs. 
- [Mitigating the Damage of Parental Alienation](https://starnetwork.org/how-to-mitigate-damage-of-parental-alienation/): Learning to always put your children’s needs and interests while being alienated from your child.
- [Elements of a Toxic Work Environment](https://starnetwork.org/what-are-the-elements-of-a-toxic-work-environment/): Find out what and who causes toxicity at work, how it affects your work, and what can you do to fix it.
- [Taylor Swift: Razor-Sharp Focus on Mental Health](https://starnetwork.org/taylor-swift-puts-razor-focus-on-mental-health/): Taylor Swift is advocating for mental health and being the healthy role model for tweens/teens and young adults. 
- [Working with Toxic Colleagues](https://starnetwork.org/how-can-you-handle-toxic-colleagues/): Dealing with a toxic coworker can be very difficult for you and your coworkers. It is crucial learning to handle this type of situation because the consequences can be detrimental. 
- [The Lasting Effects of Toxic Parenting](https://starnetwork.org/the-effects-of-toxic-parenting/): The effects of toxic parenting take root in childhood. But as an adult it's crucial to take responsibility, own your past and heal. 
- [3 Ways Your Gay Partner Might Manipulate You and 3 Ways to Answer Back](https://starnetwork.org/6-ways-in-which-your-gay-partner-might-manipulate-you-and-what-to-do-about-it/): When one partner is exerting control and holding power over the other, the outcome can be toxic. Learn to spot the signs and walk away.
- [Why Do Men Stay Too Long in Toxic Abusive Relationships?](https://starnetwork.org/why-men-stay-too-long-in-toxic-abusive-relationships/): Men tend to cling to something that’s already gone, hoping the relationship can be fixed.Staying in Toxic Abusive Relationship can only create resentment and add to trauma. 
- [The Hidden Messages Behind Taylor Swift’s Song “Anti-Hero”](https://starnetwork.org/the-hidden-messages-behind-taylor-swifts-song-anti-hero/): Analyzing different lyrics in Taylor Swift's song that show how narcissists can affect people in relationships.
- [Caregivers: Protecting Yourself from an Abusive Parent](https://starnetwork.org/as-a-caregiver-how-to-protect-yourself-from-an-abusive-parent/): Taking care of elderly toxic parents can be emotionally challenging that's why it's essential for caregivers to practise self-care.
- [Toxic Siblings: Identifying and Dealing with Them](https://starnetwork.org/signs-you-have-a-toxic-siblings-and-how-to-deal-with-them/): Signs you are dealing with a toxic sibling and how to handle the situation in a healthy way.
- [Learn How To Break the Cycle of Toxic Parenting](https://starnetwork.org/learn-how-to-break-the-cycle-of-toxic-parenting/): Toxic parenting can have a devastating impact on children’s growth and development, and it’s a cycle that can be difficult to break. 
- [How Do Women Emotionally Abuse Men?](https://starnetwork.org/how-do-women-emotionally-abuse-men/): Every one of us knows at least 1 man who was or still is a victim of emotional abuse. What can men do in this situation?
- [How You Can Heal From Narcissistic Abuse](https://starnetwork.org/how-you-can-heal-from-narcissistic-abuse/): Learn how to heal safely from narcistic abuse and understand it's complexity.
- [How To Handle Controlling Elderly Parents](https://starnetwork.org/how-to-handle-controlling-elderly-parents/): A guide for caregivers. The responsibility of providing care for an aging or ill loved one presents monumental – and sometimes insurmountable – challenges. But when a care recipient is domineering, controlling, and downright rude about how and when every single task is done, it’s bound to exasperate their family caregiver(s). Maybe your controlling elderly mother demands that you keep her company around the clock, but she certainly won’t watch any of the television shows you enjoy. Or your overbearing father might refuse to let you help him bathe, but there’s also no way he’ll ever let a professional aide […]
- [No One Compares to U! Alas, clinically, we all compare with U.](https://starnetwork.org/no-one-compares-to-u-alas-clinically-we-all-compare-with-u/): Sinéad O’Connor’s pain and suffering and finding her way to personal safety in this TAR world. The death of another icon of the music industry has all of us noticing our mortality and marking the time we have left on the planet. We all seek to renew our awareness of their God-given talents, how they’ve made us feel through their music, and how much we will miss them. As a psychologist, a trauma-informed therapist, and a lover of music, let me make one thing perfectly clear. No one did — or ever could — compare with Sinéad O’Connor. She gave us one of the […]
- [Fly Like an Eagle, Randy!](https://starnetwork.org/fly-like-an-eagle-randy/): With Deep Gratitude from TAR Network™ By James D. Huysman, PsyD, LCSW (“Dr. Jamie”) Randy Meisner — iconic bass player, and founding member of Poco and The Eagles, passed away on July 26, 2023, at age 77. Undoubtedly, he will be very much missed by family, friends, and fans alike. Randy’s passing has also reminded me of so many things related to TAR (for our new readers, our acronym for Toxic Abusive Relationships), given what I’ve learned and all of my experience with toxic worksites and narcissism. For so many of us, rock and roll bands make up an important […]

## Pages

- [ACES Quiz Test](https://starnetwork.org/aces-quiz-test/): WHAT ARE ACEs? Identified by pioneering research conducted by Vincent Felitti, MD and the CDC‑Kaiser Adverse Childhood Experiences Study, ACEs are Adverse Childhood Experiences that harm children’s developing brains. This groundbreaking, longitudinal study continues to reveal that responses to stress could damage children’s immune systems so profoundly that the effects show up decades later. ACEs have been identified at the root of chronic disease, most mental illness, and most violence. We invite you to take a short quiz to learn how ACEs have impacted you.
- [Steps](https://starnetwork.org/taranon/steps/): TAR Anon Steps TAR Anon Steps – ultimately leading to TAR Anon Promises – will help Survivors of Toxic Abusive Relationships (STARs) address their CPTSD, establish boundaries for themselves, avoid TAR Pits, be more mindful of being TARgeted, integrate a trauma-informed approach to befriend their nervous system in all daily activities, reparent their lives, break transgenerational trauma, and understand triggers and red flags to prevent future TAR. The purpose of Steps is to find Awareness, Transformation, and Self-Love. 1 Awareness Through Radical Acceptance, we acknowledged the childhood wounds we carry have shaped our lives, and that repeating patterns of emotional […]
- [Promises](https://starnetwork.org/taranon/promises/): TAR Anon Promises TAR Anon Promises are the outcomes and results of successfully working through TAR Anon Steps, and attending meetings on a continual basis. These Promises serve as guidance around the path of Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (CPTSD) recovery. Following the format of TAR Anon Meetings and working the Steps increases the chance of lasting CPTSD recovery which will serve as an emotional corrective experience for ourselves and those around us. 1 We shall rise from the fog of confusion into radiant clarity, awakening to our truest selves with tenderness, courage, and unwavering truth. 2 We will no longer be bound […]
- [TAR Anon](https://starnetwork.org/taranon/): Free Virtual Support Group Meetings Recovery from Toxic Abusive Relationships, CPTSD, and Adverse Childhood Experiences Click here to sign up Get immediate help TAR Anon is a critical element to the recovery process of narcissistic abuse. We were hurt through a relationship and that can have the tragic consequence of making us feel like all relationships are dangerous, tending us to self-isolate. With TAR Anon we can connect with others safely and feel instantly understood by others who have experienced what we have, that’s where the real healing happens. Richard GrannonSTAR Network International Ambassador Some of us have been unfortunate […]
- [TAR Tales](https://starnetwork.org/tartales/): Tell us your story And become a part of the  movement! Tell your tale Please click here to read our guidelines Only survivor stories that meet these criteria will be considered for publishing: You must own your story and the rights to it. If you’re telling someone else’s story, please have their permission to do so. The story must be grammatically correct and well-written. The story must not include marketing-related links and must not be self-promotional. Survivor stories that are approved for publishing will be published without notice.  Please check the site periodically to see if your post has been published. Survivor/recovery story […]
- [NorthSTAR](https://starnetwork.org/northstar/): NorthSTAR is a trauma-informed, turnkey program that bridges the gap between common workplace issues, employees’ daily wellness, and traditional EAP services.
- [About Us](https://starnetwork.org/about-us/): About Us What is STAR Network? STAR Network™ (formerly TAR Network) is a 501(c)(3) foundation dedicated to bringing worldwide awareness and treatment to those whose emotional reality has been distorted by narcissistic abuse. The mission of STAR Network is to support men, women, the LGBTQ+ community, tweens & teens, families, parents who are alienated from their children, workers, and caregivers going through or emerging from TAR. With subject matter experts, affiliates, organizations with supportive resources, and our individual donor community our programs will help you out of the fog and into the light. STAR Network is currently developing several innovative projects: TAR […]
- [Women](https://starnetwork.org/women/): Empowering women with the resources to break free from Toxic Abusive Relationships and become shining STARs. Get help now Our support groups Additional resources STARdom for women begins here! The National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey (NISVS) reports that 24 people every minute become victims of intimate partner violence in the United States. Toxic Abusive Relationships (TAR) leave women – four times more than men – with deep emotional and physical scars. Many remain silent due to fear of retaliation, shame, and the feeling that they won’t be believed. Sadly, women are taught to endure emotional abuse as acceptable […]
- [Men](https://starnetwork.org/men/)
- [Donate](https://starnetwork.org/donate/): Our children are counting on us! Narcissistic abuse destroys innocent lives. STAR Network‘s goal is to end transgenerational trauma, leading to a healthier world for future generations. Immersing yourself in this global community – by sharing your journey and lessons learned, making a donation, or linking local resources – is invaluable in building awareness and creating unique programs. We can’t do this without your help.
- [Article Archive](https://starnetwork.org/articles/)
- [Homepage](https://starnetwork.org/): A 501(c)(3) foundation dedicated to supporting STARs – Survivors of Toxic Abusive Relationships Free Virtual Support Group Meetings Click here to sign up Pay it forward Make a Donation to STAR Network Donate Tell Us Your Story and Join the Movement Click here A Turnkey Resilience Program for Organizations Learn more Pay it forward Make a Donation to STAR Network Donate Tell Us Your Story and Join the Movement Click here A Turnkey Resilience Program for Organizations Learn more Men Women Family Tweens & Teens LGBTQ+ Worksite Health Workers Military & Responders NEWS ARTICLES TAR TALES General TAR General TAR […]


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